Embracing Femininity – Part 3

This 3 part series was inspired by a Facebook post on a professional women's forum, bashing the “50’s housewife” and characteristics associated with that term (Click HERE for Part 1). Instead of judging, be the kind of woman who wants to see other women flourish.

Regardless of your beliefs on a woman’s role in society, I urge you to take a second and consider my words. Instead of judging your sister for her perceived effect on the feminist cause, can you instead focus on uplifting her and encouraging her to follow God’s prompting for her life?

All too often, we allow the fear of being judged to remove what it means to be the woman we were created to be. Girly-girl or tomboy, baker or grill master, whatever the preference, it's a personal choice that should not be influenced by the society around us. Don’t let fear or culture steal that choice from you.

If you’re on social media, then you have seen the following meme before...

"Be the woman who fixes another woman's crown, without telling the world it was crooked."

Which are you? Do you help out your fellow sister without calling attention to yourself? Or do you do it in a fashion that is demeaning?

Nothing angers me more than to see a successful woman bash other women who haven't climbed up the corporate ladder. As if agreeing with the stereotypical man, will somehow elevate your status as a woman. Being "one of the boys" will not make you "one of the boys." Instead, it makes you part of the problem for women as a whole.

We are quick to criticize a woman for her choice to work or not work.

She’s a bad mother if she works long hours.

She’s a bad example for her daughter if she chooses to stay home.

Forget about working for an MLM (aka pyramid scheme).

It’s a lose-lose situation.

Female Friendships

In the same vein, have you or someone you know ever said – "I only have guy friends," or "I can't be friends with other women," or "other girls just don't like me"?

Here is the problem with those statements. Women were created uniquely. In our very being, we were designed to be relational with men and women, yet there is a group of ladies, who think that they weren't meant to have girlfriends.

The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work; If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!” Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 NIV

"Greater Love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends" John 15:13 NIV.

“As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” Proverbs 27:17 NIV

“And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” Hebrews 10: 24-25

I get that none of these verses tell us to have female friends, but bear with me for a second. Women were created differently. Generally speaking, we have a need to talk about our feelings, to empathize with the fears and joys of womanhood, to sit around a coffee table and just chat about life.

How often do you see a group of guys hanging out to grab a coffee? That just doesn't happen regularly. This isn't to say that one gender is greater than another. If you believe that statement, then maybe this blog just isn't for you. Each gender is just different—period.

So, if you have ever found yourself exclaiming that you can’t be friends with other girls ask yourself this question—what message am I sending about women when I tell others I cannot befriend other women? If I were to dig deep inside of myself, would I find a character trait I need to edify in order to be a good friend myself?

Am I spreading the message that women are too emotional and I am the exception?

Am I spreading the message that men are superior, thus I can’t “handle” women?

Am I spreading the message that women are irrational, jealous, sneaky and not to be trusted?

By pushing aside your gender, you are telling the world that there is something inherently wrong with being a woman.

I understand that not everyone was meant to have a huge group of friends, but, girl, having at least one girlfriend can change your life. The quality of your friendship is what is most important, not the quantity.

So, can we agree?

There is no such thing as a superior gender.
We were created to be relational.
There is nothing wrong with being either (or both) a “traditional” woman or a “modern” woman.

Ultimately, can you be the kind of woman who wants to see other women flourish?